Saturday, October 31, 2009

Interesting FACTS about POCD and PTSD Following Surgery

anesthesia and changed mental function This study shows some alarming facts about what anesthesia does to people LONG TERM! The very facts that we patients are pointing out to our medical teams and being dismissed are actual facts. I wonder how many of the people in this study were given VERSED? They say even minor surgery can cause COPD and PTSD. What anesthesia agents are being used in this "minor" surgery? As you can see it is in the best interest of the patient to be allowed to remain awake and alert, without chemical amnesia, especially if this is what the patient desires. Notice also that the excuse that older people had disintigrating minds BEFORE being given anesthesia is also proved totally false. On the chart which shows the age group, please note which age group has the HIGHEST incidence of COPD. It isn't the older person. Also as an aside, if it were true that older people have more problems with anesthesia then why are they being given Versed? HMMM?

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Finally some RESEARCH into Benzos and PTSD!

My fellow Versed/Midazolam sufferers regularly comb the internet for insightful (and sometimes horrifying) articles on the poison that created PTSD in us and basically ruined our lives. Here are 2 articles that seem to point DIRECTLY to the medical personnels' precious Versed. The same drug that medical people just LOVE is causing mental disorders later in the patients they are purporting to help! Finally some scientists and doctors are looking into this. We are all pointing our fingers at one particular drug as the source of our anxiety and mental problems and have been summarily dismissed as psychos by the medical community. It WILL be proven that the use of Versed DID cause our problems. The medical community needs to revert back to the pre Versed days as quickly as possible. No longer will you be able to pretend that Midazolam is harmless and beneficial for patients. YOU LIKE IT, it is causing us unimaginable suffering for years after the fact! Here are the links;

This one is entitled "Are we causing PTSD with our current sedation practices?" The weird thing for me is that the word "sedation" is now used to describe amnesia. If we were just sedated, by the non medical description of the word, would we be getting PTSD? Or is the drug itself altering our brain in an unacceptable (to IT) way and creating anxiety over it's use in any minute amount? We are finally going to get some studies! I have offered over and over to have brain scans to help determine which part of my brain is sending out the signals about Versed. Since I have never had an anxiety disorder before, I would like to know! They can't GIVE me this drug again, but whatever it did is still reverberating around in my head... Are We Causing PTSD with Our Current Sedation Practices? North America > United States from

Here is the second recent article which seems to be admitting that Versed/Midazolam is the culprit, despite the screams of denial from medical practitioners! Sedatives may slow recovery from trauma - health - 01 October 2009 - New Scientist

Thanks, Paula

Monday, October 5, 2009

"Vast Improvement"

Here we have it! "VAST IMPROVEMENT" Not so I would notice. I was already having major problems with at least one of the screws, and look how he dismisses my concerns! "... does not appear objectively in any way to be related to the position or placement of the screw." "All hardware appears to be appropriately positioned" Then he goes on to threaten me with Versed (which I notice he didn't mention in this letter) and general anesthetic again!!! He cannot understand why all of this might upset me! I did NOT in fact require general anesthesia OR Versed to remove these screws. Look for yourself and see if you see the that the hardware could be a problem. He knew that I had no more money for a second opinion! I was totally screwed (pardon the pun!) at this point and my caring surgeon was pretending like I was insane!

Compare x rays of original break together

On the right are the x rays from Dr. X's office prior to surgery. Below are the x rays from the clinic. Please note the horrible, terrible "ADDITIONAL" dorsal collapse that necessitates surgery!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Informed Consent for Interscalene Block?

Here is one of my discharge papers. Click on it and read! At no time did I give permission for an Interscalene block. IF they actually gave it to me it would have been when I was unconscious which is much more risky. I was only willing to accept the risks of an axillery block so that I would NOT have to have general anesthetic. I find no reference to this interscalene block anywhere in my patient charts. I should NOT have learned of this by reading this paper. This should have been revealed and an informed consent obtained PRIOR to surgery. I still am not sure I got this, or was this paperwork actually for the axillery block? Why would I have this shoulder block when I had already had an axillery block and general anesthetic. I find this announcement to be in violation of patient rights law and unethical as well.

Reducing Complications from Interscalene Blocks

I also want to add that this paper was the only communication from anybody. This was yet another unpleasant SURPRISE from the medical professionals. My surgeon was long gone or unavailable when I was released from the hospital. Nobody will answer my questions about this or anything else. I also have to admit that I was completely out of control in the PACU as noted elsewhere in this blog. I accept that these people wanted me OUT OF THERE AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. Not any faster than I myself wanted out...

Am I Bitter? Don't surprise me!

It occured to me that my attitude might turn some people off. I am VERY BITTER about what happened to me. The things I mention here on this blog should never, ever, be left to the patient to discover. Surprise is not a word that most people want to use in conjunction with their medical treatment. I was in for the surprise of my life when I went in for a simple broken arm.

I was surprised that my Doctor never showed up prior to surgery to explain the surgery to me. NOBODY bothered to do this for me. I was surprised, shocked and HORRIFIED when this evil poison Versed was injected into my IV after everything I said about staying awake and alert, and all the problems I have had with previous surgeries and anesthetics. I was even more horrified to find that I was rendered obedient and actually helped them give me general anesthetic which I had vigorously declined. I was helpless. More HORROR when it was explained that I didn't have a leg to stand on and couldn't complain because "you can't possibly know what happened, we gave you a little something to cause amnesia!" (actual quote from Dorothy, patient relations.) I didn't get amnesia, but this sure explained a lot of why I was treated like a sub human! Shouldn't this have been explained to me prior to surgery? Shouldn't I have been able to say no? I specifically declined any drug like this, but here is another quote from Dr. B "If you had known what Versed was, you could have declined it." Well, I did decline anything that would incapacitate me or anything that was debilitating. Doesn't that cover Versed? I said that I wanted to be awake and alert and watch the surgery. Does that include Versed and general anesthetic? Why would anybody think that it's OK to do this to a person? I wasn't nervous or apprehensive! I had open reductions on my Femur TWICE without any Versed or general anesthetic.

Waking up to find that my hand was numb, my thumb didn't work, my upper arm was in excruciating agony, and there was an incision straight through all my tendons was a horrible surprise. Of course my Doctor was unavailable following surgery as well. I was left to discover just what had happened all on my own. I am still trying to figure out why this is so. Am I supposed to just trust the Dr. to do whatever he/she wants, and not care about the consequences? Does it matter that I needed my hand to work as I am really active? Am I supposed to just be grateful that my wrist is MARGINALLY straighter regardless of what I had to give up in soft tissue function? (Not to mention the PTSD which is pretty profound. ) What would be the point of concealing all of this? It's against patient rights laws, but I am trying to figure out the mental process by which medical people decide that the patient doesn't matter, just performing surgery, the devil take the consequences.

Can anybody else imagine the TERROR of knowing that your arm is screwed up, and there is NO WAY IN HELL you will trust anybody in the medical field again? I KNEW the surgery was bad. I know my body better than anybody else. I could feel the screws tearing at my flesh and I knew what could happen, but there was NO WAY I was going to go through the indignity of another surgery at this same hospital, and no way was I ever going to go through the mental disintegration of Versed for any reason, even to save my wretched life! I had my first panic attack in my life right there in Dr. M's office when he told me that not only was he NOT going to take out the offending hardware, but that even if he did, that I would have to have Versed and general anesthesia again as he doesn't work on conscious patients! OMG!!!!!! Why didn't he tell me that all of this would take place BEFORE I was stuck with the porcupine device in my arm? Dr. M never mentioned one single word about this in our expensive "consultation!" I was so terrified I wanted to steal Novocaine from my dentist's office and attempt to take the screws out myself. I don't want to be a cripple! I was completely unprepared for any of this! I couldn't believe that somebody I trusted to HELP me would damage me this much and conceal the horror of it all so that I would let him operate...

I still have not received any answers to my questions, only attitude from everybody involved. I didn't start out with my nasty attitude, it congealed from 3 years and more of trying to get answers. Originally I was hurt, devastated that these people thought so little of me personally that they felt confident smashing into my brain and body without permission and without telling me the true results of the surgery or the anesthetic. I am such low life SCUM that my wishes don't matter? I am too STUPID to decide for myself whether I wanted all this? I am too IGNORANT AND UNEDUCATED to be given any information because I "wouldn't understand it anyway?!" Am I so UNIMPORTANT that the surgery should be performed like you see on this blog? How would you feel? Would you be bitter? This whole thing ruined my life. It damaged my husband's life and my little girl's life. It might not seem like much to you, but I deeply resent all of this. I am not somebodies DOG!

Friday, October 2, 2009

This particular site has been a gold mine.

Elsewhere in this blog I have shown little self tapping purple or magenta screws sticking out into "who knows what" in my forearm. Well, here is the exact same screw right down to the color, in somebody else's arm. LOOK WHAT JUST THIS ONE SCREW DID!!!!! I need to get in to a Dr. as soon as possible and have this checked out! I had 3 of them sticking out between 1/4 and 3/8's inch minimum. These are clearly visible in all the x-rays here on this blog, and I show them on a fake skeleton arm here as well. Check it out!Guest Professor David Nelson Case 2 As an aside, the woman in whose arm this happened was also dismissed as a crazy. Is this something Dr.s routinely do in order to minimize their culpability? At least this one finally took her seriously and didn't just summarily dismiss her like mine did.

Found this recent study on ORIF

Complications of Volar Plating My Dr. didn't believe that this stuff could happen. Even when he saw my x-rays and heard my complaints, he still didn't respond to it. My case is not in these kinds of studies because my Dr. doesn't believe there were any problems whatsoever with his surgery. He was fine with my loss of grip, numbness, thumb not working, pain, screw sticking up almost out of the skin, the shredding of my muscles and tendons, loss of mobility in my wrist, this is all just fine because the bone is marginally straighter. he seemed shocked that I would complain about the surgery. He acted like I was nuts to think that he should have revealed all of this PRIOR to surgery. He made sure that he never saw me in the hospital, being over an hour late for surgery and I wonder if this was a ploy to avoid having to answer any questions? He wouldn't take my calls in the days preceding the surgery either. I thought he was just busy, but NOW after everything, I have my suspicions. Nobody will answer any questions for me and the next two surgeons were busy making excuses for Dr. M. If all these bad outcomes are common, as shown in this study, then why wasn't I made aware of all this so I could make a decision NOT TO HAVE THIS SURGERY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. I NEVER WOULD HAVE AGREED TO THIS SURGERY BECAUSE OF THE EXTREME RISK INVOLVED!!!!!

Where is the new legislation in this "Health Care Reform" bill to prevent what happened to me from happening to anybody else? Where are the huge fines for violating patient rights? Where are the criminal statutes for deliberately defying patient rights laws? Where is the mediation for the enormous hospital bills these people run up while disobeying patient wishes? Where is the legislation forcing hospitals to be responsible for patient rights while in their facility? Where is the pricing transparency like they have for auto mechanics? Where is the legislation forcing anybody in the health care field to be randomly drug tested? Where is the legislation for ensuring that health care providers are mentally competent to provide care for helpless people? Where is the legislation providing for mediation or arbitration? Is it OK to treat people like I was treated so that the medical people can suck the last dime out of our whole economy? We patients are absolutely helpless!!!! We aren't being treated like humans at all and all our politicians can talk about is TORT REFORM? What the hell. Why can't I be held harmless for any careless, reckless thing I may do? I don't like paying so much for liability insurance on my big rig! (Everybody knows big rigs have good insurance and deep pockets!) I have to pay huge additional insurance lest I harm somebody's property when I make a delivery as well! I don't want to pay home owners insurance in case somebody gets hurt on my property through no fault of my own! Where is the legislation CAPPING THE COST OF HEALTH INSURANCE? Oh hell no, we are only going to help out the rich Doctors. They don't want to pay 20,000 of their million dollar salary for malpractice insurance do they? (so what if I do as a moron truck driver!) They don't want to be held responsible for directly defying patient wishes. They want to make sure they have an unending supply of helpless people to injure further.

How it all started

Here is the original x ray from the clinic. Yes it is a bad break, but to say that it could only be treated surgically is a lie. If I had known then what I know now after years of research, I would have taped a golf ball under my wrist at the break and wrapped my arm so that the hand was pulled slightly under and down. I bet I would have been a lot happier and I would have retained hand function. I also bet that NONE of what Dr. M threatened would have happened! Unbelievably I found this link showing that what I wanted was NOT unheard of! Distal Radius

Here are the notes from my surgeon. I have NEVER SEEN A PATIENT CHART, just these notes written to the nurse who sent me to this Dr. This is against the law, but all I have are these notes. I want to show how inaccurate this can be. In the very first sentence, where it says I had a "fall from a horse?" This is inaccurate. I repeatedly stated that I had been knocked down by a horse. Big difference. On the second page it says that "...the fracture has settled further with an increase in dorsal tilt and dorsal collapse of the fracture leaving an overall unacceptable reduction." Unacceptable to whom? There WAS a barely noticable tilt, in the x-rays, but this was acceptable to me! However, using scare tactics and complete lack of pertinent information of was manipulated into having this surgery.

Here are the scare tactics; "...if this injury is treated non-operatively without any attempt at reduction that her wrist would likely go on to heal with considerable deformity leading to subsequent chronic pain and stiffness and posttraumatic arthritis of her wrist." (He also mentioned in another letter that he told me I would never work again in my profession if I didn't have this surgery. I'll put that up on this blog as well.) I wish he had tried this first. Maybe there isn't enough money in this?

At the top of the second page which contains this statement, read where "Other than the swelling, she does not have any visible or grossly palpable deformity at the wrist." So how come it would "go on to heal with considerable deformity?" On the first page it says "She has normal sensation and motor function in the radial, median and ulnar nerve distributions." This is not what I have now, due entirely to the surgery.

Also of note is this "Physical exam reveals a 51 year old female in no urgent distress. Her mood is pleasant, and her affect is appropriate. She is alert and oriented." This description is consistent all the way through every single chart, from the Dr's office to the hospital intake. "Pleasant woman in no distress" is what the hospital personnel said. I have not been the same since this ill advised surgery. Not physically nor mentally, nor financially.

Nothing in here about me declining general anesthesia. Nothing in here about me being "crazy to start with." Nothing in here about the severing of tendons, screw placement causing tendon rupture, nothing about where the incision was going to be, nothing substantive about the surgery, repeated surgeries, just the threats of chronic pain etc.

Later on this Dr. claims that he gave me a "choice" of having the arm reset in his office. Look what all he says in his statement. He never offered me this choice, just mentioned that if he tried something like that, that it wouldn't work anyway.

I was uninsured as my employer didn't offer health insurance. I wanted external reduction, not surgery. Did you note that an "external fixator" is never mentioned? He only told me about that option after I was in hysterics over the poor outcome of the ORIF. Yes Dr. M offered to let me pay in payments, but his office misrepresented the cost of the surgery, to the point that it is just impossible to pay off. If they had told me the truth, I would NEVER have consented to this surgery based on cost alone! (not to mention the horrible consequences of the surgery and the forced anesthesia!)


I made 12,000 dollars in 2006 and my cost for a 70 minute operation was more than I grossed for that year. Angry about it, you bet. I am a conscientious consumer and I keep my bills under control. They had no right to quote me one price and then pad it by thousands of dollars. How am I to manage my finances with this kind of thing going on in the biggest expense after housing? This whole surgery was completely unecessary, and way too expensive for a poor truck driver.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Dr. X X-Rays

This is the original break. I had straightened it out myself before my little girl saw it and freaked out. Looks fairly OK. ( I accidently flipped this x-ray.)

Here are the first x-rays taken after the surgery. I had to FORCE MYSELF to return to the Dr. I was very upset by the assault with anesthesia drugs, the numbness, my thumb didn't work, my upper arm was a throbbing agony from the tourniquet, and the incision was straight through the tendons on the tender underside of my wrist, screws sticking out of the bone everywhere! This was all completely unexpected. It felt like a cheese grater was in my wrist joint. Very painful. You can also see the styloid fracture of the Ulna which was left untreated.

A little over a month past the surgery. I was still complaining about all of the above and the pain and swelling in my wrist joint. I could see and feel the tip of the longest screw sticking up from my wrist. I imagined that if I pressed down on the bump, I could create a hole in my skin with the screw tip. I was paranoid about infection, this screw giving me arthritis, this screw wrecking my wrist joint and cutting my tendon to my thumb... These are also from Dr. X's office. I complained and he fired me as a patient.

The last x-rays from Dr. X 7/12/2006. You can also clearly see the "locking" screw protruding out of the bone and into the bottom of my wrist (volar aspect) in this x-ray and the previous one, along with all the screws sticking out into my forearm.

X-Rays Showing Placement

Compare this to the one from Dr. M's office... The bones have NOT shrunk, settled, or anything else. This is how they were placed in the original surgery and this is how they remained until they were removed.
In the first x ray you can see the "proper" placement of the screws. Note the "barely palpable" tip of the longest screw. This is also visible in "Dr. M's X-Rays" in the same exact position! These x-rays were taken a year and half after surgery. I suffered with this stuff in my arm shredding who knows what for that long.
Here is the x ray from a slighly different angle. Dr. V had these taken because I was complaining about it and he took me seriously.
Doesn't this look comfortable? Am I hysterical and imagining this? Look at all the screws sticking out! Dr. M said that this is fine, that these can stay in my arm forever. These screws have not moved one single millimeter! See the x-rays under "Dr. M's X-Rays"